Where are you going?
When are you leaving?
When will you be back?
Out of the 3 most popular questions I'm literally facing right now, the 3rd one has the least weight dragging my heart. Although, "least" it still hurts nonetheless. It hurts because I have been quite familiar with the feeling of being the one left behind, and sad to say this time around, i get to be the one boarding on a plane with only God knows when ill be back.
The having-to-go-somewhere-else (i prefer the term better than the other "L" word) has always been there. I know that for a fact and everyone close to me is aware of it. But as the day comes near and things are getting out of my control, there are moments when I wish I can just stay grounded. Sometimes, i wish that I don't have to "GO". That I don't have to prove anything to anyone or myself for that matter. That I don't have to do this or that. That i don't have that unexplainable fear of missing out on things and people who means so much to me. That i don't get to worry about not being there when i have to be there. That i don't have to hear them cry and most myself cry because of the impending distance.
But then I have to. No matter how much it pains me, no matter how the way it hurts, and no matter how hard I try not to make it obvious that it is slowly killing me, i have to...
I have to throw myself out there...
I dunno...
Soon...
In a few years time i guess...
Bunso's Shadow at the Park...
